Ever have a disagreement with someone? It seems that person disagrees with you every time you bring up an idea in conversation? Ever get a little annoyed over this and react in a way that will have you grimacing later? How should we respond to those people who seem to constantly see the world differently than you?
There are counter-voices everywhere we go. You can’t escape disagreements because we’re all so vastly different with various unique traits, backgrounds, and cultures. While it’s nice to surround ourselves with yes people – people who affirm our greatness – there is a danger in not hearing the full truth. There is a danger of not growing. Because, that’s what the counter voice is there for. The counter voice should help one grow.
In the Genesis narrative we’re introduced to two people Ish (man) meaning fire, passion, energy and Ah-Ish (woman) meaning balance, breathe, peace. For the Hebrew sages, when they discussed these two people they would often refer to them as the counter voices.
Think of the relationships you’ve been in for a moment. Often that person closest to you may have a differing opinion of your awesomeness. From time to time they may tell you painful truths that you may not desire to hear. These are the counter voices and we desperately need them if we are to grow. But it’s often so painful!
So, that “nagging wife”, “annoying husband”, or “frustrating boss” may actually have some valuable insight into areas that need the most growth.
So, the Ah-Ish brings a sense of balance and caution when Ish begins to move in unhealthy extremes. And Ish brings the passion and excitement needed for Ah-Ish to move on those steps that must take place for growth.
We need each other. We need the counter voice. The counter voice is actually a blessing if we are willing to listen.
The problem is that the counter voice is often the most dangerous for one’s ego. When your value comes from being right, having it all together, being the “man”, then one may never actually experience growth because their pride causes them to turn a deaf ear.
In a segmented world of politics, economics, and race relations we often stake our claim – side with the tribe we’re comfortable with most, the community that looks exactly like us. We’ll attempt to safe-guard ourselves because growth and change is often terrifying. Yet, when we do this, we often miss the opportunity to become a more grounded person with a larger view of the world and now able to do greater things.
My hope for you, me, our faith communities and our nation is that we will begin to listen and value the counter voice even if we don’t agree. We will choose not to demonize them but learn to respect them. May we take time to listen, converse, disagree and grow. May we learn not to violently fight against the counter voice but learn to drop the ego and sit at the table together finding growth.
The counter voice offers growth.